I Hate Shopping

I don't know why I bother going to the grocery store during the day. The place is literally crawling with old people up until 5:00pm. It looked like a Civil War reunion was going on, for Christ's sake.

I used to wonder why old people took over the grocery stores during the early afternoon. I think I finally figured it out. At first, I thought it was because they wanted to avoid all contact with people who were born less than 100 years ago, people who tend to go shopping in the evening. But then it dawned on me--old people get up at the fucking crack of dawn (for unknown reasons) and usually head to bed around 7:00pm. Hell, for them, noon is practically dinner time.

I wouldn't mind it so much if they weren't so fucking annoying. But they love to stand around with dumb expressions on their wrinkly faces, their carts blocking off the entire aisle as they decide what size Depends Undergarments they need to buy. Meanwhile, 800 people have to patiently stand there, waiting for them to move out of the fucking way. I'm not sure if they're completely oblivious to the world around them or they just don't give a fuck. Either way, fuck them.

That's why I'll never understand the Japanese. They worship old geezers over there, and act as if they're the country's greatest resource. I guess the idea is that people who grow to be very, very old must be smarter than the rest of us because they've experienced so much more. A good idea in theory, but I don't buy it. I've said this before, and I'll say it again--if a person is born a total fucking moron, it doesn't really matter how old they get. They could live to be 120 years old and they'll still be morons.

Fucking old people. Fortunately for me, my lifestyle pretty much guarantees that I won't even make it to age 50. A good thing, too, because if I ever got to be old I'd hate myself even more than I already do.

Bah.