by Daniel "Tanz" Lattanzio, staff writer

Dean managed to get an advance copy of the new Beastie Boys CD, “To The 5 Boroughs,” into my hands to review. I wanted to have this completely written before the weekend, but that proved difficult after several listens - I had to let it “settle.” I’ve sat in front of my laptop listening to this CD on repeat for days, thinking I may have bitten off more than I could chew. How could I sum this up in under a thousand words, without skimping? The simple answer is: I can’t. Every time I listen, I catch something new, there’s just a lot going on, without being overbearing.

You see, I’m not a major Beastie Boys fan. I really liked the first two albums, but everything after “Paul’s Boutique” just fell flat for me. However, since they haven’t released a CD in the past six years, my curiosity compelled me to sit down and hear what “The 3” were up to. I’ll be honest, I’m anything but disappointed. I found this album to be more of a return to the older days than I had expected. Of course, there are still more pop culture references and tongue-in-cheek wordplay than you could shake a Dennis Miller Rant at. But the Boys have grown: of course, the homophobic vibes are gone, only to be replaced by the occasional political commentary – something I found quite enjoyable. Also a part of me can’t help but think that the title is a pun itself: a reference to William Burroughs’ writing style…

Besides heralding their return, this album is a “shout out” to their New York roots. In this post-9/11 world where everyone loves New York, these guys have been bragging about their home for decades. If anyone has a right to dedicate their album to NY, it’s the Beasties.

I could go on and dissect each track, but that would take forever – as I said, there is a LOT going on. It’s mostly upbeat and, many times, downright funny. I’m just going to touch upon the highlights and leave the individual song dissection to the Usenet groupies. I still have a life. Allow me to briefly touch upon some of the stand-out tracks:

“Ch-Check It Out” is the opening track, and can be best summed up with “We’re back! Let’s party!” “Right Right Now Now” says “We’ve got to work together/ it’s been too long” – a reference not only to their hiatus, but to the state of the world today.

“An Open Letter to NYC” is their tribute to their home, someplace where everyone together makes it what it is and nothing can stop them. Another track filled with hometown props is “Hey Fuck You” - a pretty self-explanatory rhyme, but it gives us the phrase “so put a quarter in your ass because you played yourself.” Strangely catchy.

“That’s It That’s All” and “Triple Trouble” could easily fit onto a “Licensed to Ill Version 1.5” – they seem to be ripped right from that era, only more contemporary.

Having already fought (and presumably won) their right to party, “All Life Styles” is about keeping the party going on.

My personal favorite is track four, “Time to Build,” a scathing critique of America’s current foreign policy and President Bush, ending nicely with a spoken bit referring to the old video game “Defender.”

This is the most “organic” album the Boys have had in a while, older fans should really enjoy it. And the hardcore fans will buy it nonetheless – they’ve been waiting for this for years! I have easily listened to this CD a dozen times now, and still catch some nuance or comment I missed. There is a lot to ingest, so be sure to spin it over and over.

I guess I should do the typical thing of rating it on a 1 to 5 scale. (Unless you’re a total idiot and stumbled upon this website by randomly pounding on the keyboard, you already know that 1 is the worst and 5 is the best.) I need something like stars or some shit to represent the scale…but I don’t feel like being cute. “Somethings” is what I will use.

My score for “To the 5 Boroughs” is 4 out of 5 Somethings. With the exception of “Open Letter…” the songs average a running time of 2 minutes 50 seconds. But they are each a fully-packed three minutes, unlikely to disappoint. “Boroughs” is great to play at a gathering, but to get the full effect, you’re going to need to sit down and listen to it several times uninterrupted. Otherwise, you’re going to be in my shoes, driving to my day job and constantly rewinding the CD to verify what I just heard and spending an hour listening to only three tracks.

Am I wrong? Did I do the CD an injustice? Do you think they suck? Email me your thoughts and be heard!

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