|
by Doc, DeansPlanet.Com staff writer |
| Can I Have Your Autograph... / Free Johnny |
| Free
Johnny
09-10-04 |
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The
first week of May was not too good of a week for myself
or for today’s Shrine inductee. We both had a run-in
with the law that week. For me it was May 1st, time was
running out on entering the MissButtaface contest in Vegas
and I  had someone in mind. I remember Robin saying on the
air earlier that week, "Go up and ask that girl if
she would like to enter the contest, chances are she knows
she is a buttaface. What’s the worst that can happen?"
With Robin’s words fresh in my mind and also Howard’s
who commented that day that after looking at the entries
so far, in his opinion, the quintessential missbuttaface
was still out there, I approached the 22 year old girl hospital
worker with a deformed face from birth and asked if she
would like to enter the contest. She politely heard me out
then pleasantly told me she was very interested but had
to think about it and took my phone number down. (I offered
to help her enter if she needed help). The next day I received
a call from her grandmother who told me that her granddaughter
was very interested. She gave me directions to their house
and asked me to stop over the next day, around noon. When
I got there to take the pics and help the young lady enter,
anxious to do my good Stern deed of the day, I was confronted
by the grandmother and three other people who all berated
me , calling me a fucking pervert, calling Howard a fucking
pervert, then blocked me from leaving their porch, called
 the police and told them I was trespassing.. Criminal trespassing
was the case that they gave me. I decided to take it to
court. I didn’t want to plead guilty since I wasn’t.
After two delays I finally got my day in court and sure
enough not only did the grandmother lie under oath telling
the judge that she told me to leave 9 times in the 5 minutes
I was there, the officer of the law, sworn to serve and
protect sat quietly while she also told the judge that the
people who stopped
me from leaving weren’t even there. Can you imagine?
Didn’t anyone bother to read the police report? All
the lady judge had to hear was Howard Stern and this case
was over...guilty as charged. She did give the lightest
fine possible of $50 but with court fees and attorney fees
(waste of money) I was out $445 simply trying to help the
show and possible change the life of a young lady who was
dealt a bad hand or bad face as it were. The funniest thing
is the chick didn’t even live there. I bet she didn’t
even know this all went down. Grandmother is a crafty old
bitch. I don’t have a pic of the girl but picture
the bod of Pamela Anderson with a face very similar to
this pic I found on the web.
Now tell me... Wouldn’t a chick that looked like this
have been awesome for that show? The quintessential MissButtaface.
Recently I was hanging out at the new Howard
Stern Bulletin Board, the only great place left on the
web to talk about Howard and the show, besides my
place of course, when I spotted a few messages by today’s
featured shrine inductee and recent Stern show guest, Johnny
McCarthy.  Johnny
was directing people to his website, www.freejohnny.com
and telling HIS story from that week. It was May
4th for Johnny, the day he was also charged with criminal
trespassing along with interfering in a public sporting
event. His was to be the very first case of the new Calvin
Klein Law. Johnny claims he fell on to the Shea stadium
field and despite witnesses supporting his story Johnny
was found guilty and sentenced to serve 8 straight weekends
in the big house. Damn….I had to hear more. I posted
and asked Johnny if he would be interested in sending me
an autograph for the shrine and doing an interview for The
Planet. He was more than happy to oblige. Thank you Johnny.
Johnny first sent me his story and we conducted the interview
a few days later.
Johnny’s
story:
I
went to a Met game on May 4th vs the San Fran Giants. I had
heard about the get John's job contest and figured if a foul
ball was hit towards me the news might get wind of my sign
and I would be able to see it on video and send it to Howard.
Since I have worked for the Stern show before I knew that
only people who stand out have a chance. Unless of course
they are freaks. So anyway a foul ball was coming our way
and everyone was going for the ball. I wound up falling over
the wall. The only video anyone saw was me on the field. There
was more to the video but the press only got that part. When
my attorney asked for the video they only produced the part
where I was on the field. Every person who was at the game
said "That guy fell but he had a Howard stern sign so
it looked premeditated." I didn’t even know it
was such a big deal until the people in jail said they saw
me on TV. I was in jail for four days with no phone call or
medical attention for my broken shoulder. They also took away
my public defender which made me have to get an attorney.
I spent all my money fighting but I couldn’t win with
the cover-ups. The person who wrote the law, Peter Vallone,
was married to the DA Kristen Vallone. There is also a judge
that is related as well. So now I had to fight nepotism. I
had no chance but was trying to work the best deal. I think
I did that. I couldn’t afford another 20 grand. They
also paraded me around like a circus act. They showed very
bad taste and I just wish the corruption would have come out.
Now that the criminal case is gone I am going to sue there
ass off. I am also going to write a book called "Howard
where's Johnny?" I am totally willing to talk to anyone
about this because it is complete bull how the system manipulates
things to get what they want. They put it in the news, I didn't.
But when I did they called me a publicity punk. Damn right
because it was the only shot I had. When the book comes out
it will have a lot more about the story plus my days working
with Howard and the recent times I have been on the show.
Talk to you soon JOHNNY. |
| The
Interview: |
| Doc:
Hi Johnny. Thank you for granting me this interview on this
last weekend of freedom before you start your sentence. How
do you plan on spending your time this weekend? |
| Johnny:
I
plan to spend the weekend in the hospital since I almost died
on Friday due to my appendix bursting. If the treatment in
jail was the same as the first time I should come out dead.
|
| Doc:
How do you plan on spending your time in prison? |
| Johnny:
I
will be writing a few books. One will be the reality of jail
and the system that puts you there. How corrupt both are.
And it will be reality not like reality TV. I am not supposed
to work at all for 8 weeks but since I didn’t get a
phone call or medical attention the first time I don’t
expect it now. |
| Doc:
Have you ever been in prison before? What concerns you about
going to prison? |
 Johnny:
I
have never been to prison just to jail a few times and just
for a few days. I am only concerned that the people in jail
won’t listen.
Doc: Looking back at the experience, what
regrets do you have? What would you have changed?
Johnny:
It
wasn’t planned so I can’t change it. If I could
I would not promote anyone but myself because it almost cost
me a year in jail.
Doc:
Do you still claim your innocence?
Johnny:
I
was stupid for pulling out my sign. I was holding it up all
game. It wasn’t an intentional act and the punishment
does not fit the crime.
|
| Doc:
What was it like being in the studio with Howard and the gang?
|
| Johnny:
It
was great to be on the show again. I feel at home in the studio
since I have worked there before. The gang was great when
I was first on but since the station is in cahoots with the
Mets they changed their tune after my first appearance on
the show. I heard Gary today say that he could get Robin to
throw out the first ball if she wanted. So they turned on
the little guy too because I got too much publicity. How dare
they. |
| Doc:
What did you do for the show |
| Johnny:
I
was an intern from 91 to 93 |
| Doc:
Cool time to be there. Who do you like better, Jackie, Billy,
or Artie ? |
| Johnny:
Jackie…Jackie
was great and the only reason the show doesn’t think
so is because they are self promoting . If Artie leaves he
will be a fat drunk slob. |
| Doc:
Any behind the scenes stories you can share with us fans?
|
| Johnny:
I got to meet porn stars, all the members of the staff, a
blind guy, Beetlejuice and his family, Ali G and Alanis Morrisette.
I took pictures of the blind guy holding a sign that said
"Miss Howard Stern Beauty contest winner" I told
him the sign said Howard Stern for President. I made him take
pictures too. Those should come out great. I also took some
memorabilia since the show is too cheap to pay for parking
I felt I deserved something. |
| Doc:
Howard refused to take a pic with you at the end of your appearance.
Did he give you that pic during the break? |
| Johnny:
I
have pictures with Howard. I was sitting with the porn star
and told her I would ask for one. I said Howard wouldn’t
give me one. She said he would. I was right he didn’t.
I snapped one anyway. Freedom of picture phones. |
| Doc:
Would you like to go back on the show again sometime? |
| Johnny:
I
would go back on the show but I have a feeling they would
try to rip me a new ass. Like that won’t happen in Rikers
|
| Doc:
Who do you like in the series? |
| Johnny:
I
love the Yankees and hope the Mets’ plane crashes into
the District Attorneys office in Queens. |
| Doc:
Did you get close enough to Benjy to catch a wiff and if so,.
how would you describe his smell? |
| Johnny:
He
used cologne to mask the smell. It smelled like sour milk.
|
|
| Doc:
How long have you been a Stern fan? How much of the show do
you catch everyday? |
| Johnny:
I
used to listen a lot, but when I started to see how much the
public doesn’t know I cut down drastically. I don’t
think he should talk about Bush so much since he does the
same thing. My cousin worked with Howard. I worked with Howard.
I know the real stories. They will be in the book. "Howard
where’s JOHNNY!" |
| Doc:
How big is your penis? |
| Johnny:
Pretty big. About 8 inches and wide. Not as big as Howard’s
mouth. LOL |
| Doc:
Finally, if you could kill three people from the experience
or at least give them a good smack across their mouth, who
would it be and why?. |
| Johnny:
Kristen
Vallone, Peter Vallone, and Judge Knopf. They were all out
to make a name. I wouldn’t kill any of them but would
hope they feel the pain I felt. The Mets as well should kiss
my ass. |
| Doc: Thanks for everything Johnny, get well soon and good luck this weekend and the weekends to come. Johnny has also agreed to send us weekend updates about his time in prison so be sure to check back weekly for those. And be sure to visit Johnny’s website at www.freejohnny.com. |
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