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by Doc, DeansPlanet.Com staff writer
Can I Have Your Autograph... / Funny Bone
Comedy is my Mistress!
02-14-05
 

Comedy is my mistress and this past weekend, with my Sunday best on and flowers in hand, I went a courtin' --to the Funny Bone Comedy Club. Located in Pittsburgh’s popular night spot, Station Square, I felt immediately at home when I walked through the front door. Covering the walls were dozens of framed 8x10 headshots of some of the very funny people who have performed there. My pants tightened. Admiring the Funny Bone’s "Shrine," I noticed that something was missing. Where are the autographs? Sadly, only a few of the photos were signed. They seem so bare I thought. As I walked further down the hall I was pleased to see the walls near the comedy room entrance covered in messages and autographs left by some of those performers. OOOH YEAAHH!!! I almost had to relieve myself right there on the spot. Looking over the walls I found one made by the night’s featured artist, the very talented Don Jamison. I had met Don two years before at an event in New Jersey. I thought back to then and remembered that less than a minute after meeting I managed to get a cool pic with him-- not too mention a nice handful of ass. Not sure why I did it, maybe it was the beer, maybe it was the way the moonlight bounced off his hair but I fondled Don’s ass while the picture was being taken. Now, here I was with pink roses to give to Jim Florentine, his partner and headliner for the night, in thanks for inviting me to the show. Hmm…..Maybe I didn’t think this one out too good. Haha!!

The comedy room itself is very pleasing to the eye with beautiful curtains, and colorful "art" gracing the walls, including an awesome Last Supper painting with the late, great Lenny Bruce as the head Jew. Jim and Don put on another awesome show for the sold-out crowd. I even learned a good way of getting out of dancing. Afterwards, I caught them outside in the hall selling their wares, said hello, and asked them to sign the 20th Anniversary poster the Funny Bone was giving out that night. They gladly signed and invited me up to the backstage room. While they relaxed before the second show of the night, we had a chance to chat. We talked about the Stern Show.

 

We talked about different events on the internet, including my recent brush with the law. (some crazy c-word sent me a picture of herself, then reported me to my local police when I used it in my blog) They both talked about the time Rev Bob Levy challenged me to a kick boxing match to settle an internet dispute and how he told them that he was going to kick my ass, then donate his bloody gloves to the shrine. Damn…Now he tells me. I took the opportunity to ask Jim about one of his "Creep" friends, KC Armstrong. KC, a long time Stern show crew member, has been off the show for months and no one knows exactly why. Surprisingly, Jim told me that he also is in the dark, that everyone is hush-hush about it, and that he hasn’t personally spoken to KC in four months. We both agreed that, no matter what was going on, we hoped that the latest rumor that KC would be returning to the show this month was true. Despite all the great new changes to the show, like the addition of Richard Christy, Sal the Stockbroker and Dan the Song Parody Man, the show just isn’t quite the same with KC gone. Later, the owner of the Funny Bone, Jeff Schneider, joined us and shared some of his stories. He talked about the last time Beetlejuice was there and how he had gotten in to a fight with his manager, Sean Rooney. He talked about how Beet was walking around with shit all over himself. I was backstage at that show too ( a guest of Rev Bob that time) and I remember Nick DiPalo complaining about the mic smelling after Beet handled it. Yikes!! Jeff also told me that he had to add extra security for Jim’s show because he was getting threats. Someone was upset with Jim’s Special Ed character and was going to bring 30 guys down and disrupt the show. But the evening went smooth without a hitch YAAY!! The evening went smooth without a hitch YAAY!!!

It was great getting to hang with Jim and Don again and it was really cool meeting Jeff, a very friendly man and all-around good dude. As I was getting ready to leave he even gave me a copy of his 20th anniversary cd containing 42 hilarious comedy bits from various performances at the Funny Bone over the years. I listened to the comedy cd all the way home, laughing, thinking about what a great show I just saw and looking forward to watching the Meet the Creeps DVD that Jim gave me before I left. My mistress was very sweet this weekend….and wet…Nice!! "It's all about the love."

I learned that Jeff has his own talk radio show on The Edge, AM-1550, weekdays from 2 to 3. I checked out his show the following Monday and I have to say I really enjoyed it. He talked about the weekend at the Funny Bone, about Howard and the show and shared more stories about Jim and Don. Don’s first time in the burg proved successful, according to Jeff, banging three young ladies over the weekend. Not bad. I understand that Don even used my flowers to lure the last one in to his love trap. Glad I could help! If you would like to hear Jeff’s show, you can listen on the web here. You can even call in at 412-924-1550. That’s what I did. Since I broke my silence a few weeks ago, posting one of my audio interviews, I figured what the hell! I made my very first phone call to a radio show....EVER!! I just wanted to thank Jeff for the good time. It’s not the greatest call in the world but hey, it‘s a start…. Look out Howard Stern…You may be next.

If you are in the Pittsburgh area be sure and check out a show at the Funny Bone. Always a great time…. and keep an eye out for Jim and Don coming to a comedy club next you. They put on a super show. You might want to keep an eye on the women folk when they are in town too.....and your toilets.

(One thing I wanted to talk to Jim about but forgot to was the tragic passing of his good friend Dimebag Darrell. A member of my message board, bloodorflies, was a huge fan of his as well and he made a tribute thread in his honor. Please feel free to stop by and add your comments.)

http://www.howardshrine.net/viewtopic.php?t=1323