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by Doc, DeansPlanet.Com staff writer |
| Can I Have Your Autograph... / Queen Abby |
Queen Abby
11-27-07
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Wow, I can’t believe it has been six months since my last interview. I still listen to the Howard Stern show everyday, make my Stern blogs, collect autographs from Stern show celebrities, oversee the Howard Shrine message board, and  watch as much Howard TV as I can, but truth be told, my obsession is beginning to wane after all these years. Lately I seem to be more obsessed with cigars, drinking Jack, making my dick bigger, hot chicks, and learning to play blues on my guitar. You see I got this hyper focus thing going on too like Howard. Howard has his chess, I got the blues. My wife says I am going through mid-life crisis. It’s possible. I did tell her I want to get good enough on my ax to buy a van, head to N’ Orleans and bounce from club to club playing for my food and drinks. Hahaha So who brought me out of my semi-retirement from Stern celebrity journalism? A hot chick of course, but not just any hot chick, one who made 92 farts in a minute with her pussy. Music to my ears…..like a B.B. King vibrato. Today’s new Shrine Inductee? The lovely, newly crowned Queen of the Queefers, Abby the Queefer now known simply as Queen Abby. Queen Abby defeated Eve the Queefer, then long time holder of the title, Debbie the Queefer in a showdown of the talking vagines. I contacted Abby after she recently joined the Shrine message board. Abby responded and was nice enough to send me her autograph to add to our tribute, and grant me an interview. It turns out that Abby doesn’t live far from me and there is talk about this journalist getting a chance to feel the power of her queef. Hey Now. I will let you know it that more in-DEPTH interview occurs. Until then please enjoy this interview: |
| Doc: How did you like your Howard Stern show appearances? Who were you most happy to meet, is there anyone you didn't like? |
| Abby: I looooooooved both of my appearances. Just going on the show and meeting everyone was so awesome. I was most excited to meet Howard of course, but loved meeting everyone else as well, and I can't think of anyone I didn't like, except maybe my competition. |
| Doc: How long have you been a Howard Stern fan? How much do you listen everyday? Do you have Howard tv? |
| Abby: I've been a Stern fan for a good 10 years. I don't get to listen everyday because believe it or not, queefing isn't my only job. I have a real job I go to every day which prevents me from listening all the time. I listen on my brakes and oh yeah, I watch Howard TV every day. |
| Doc: You mentioned that you have a wild side. Tell us about that wide side. You said that you have had a threesome with your husband. Any other details of that or other wide side activities you can share? |
 Abby: I've always been into hot chics, who isn't? My husband and I did have a threesome (my idea), however I wasn't as into her as I was hoping. She wasn't really my type but I really wanted to have a threesome so I figured, what the hell. She and I went down on each other and it ended with my husband screwing her and me watching. Which was okay with me cuz she kinda sucked. I have had other encounters with hotter chics and would definitely have another threesome. I'm definitely a party girl, but I don't do it all the time.
Doc: How do you like your new found Stern fame? Do people in your community recognize you now and ask for autographs or a queef, etc?
Abby: I love that I had the opportunity to be a part of the show. I can't wait to go back again. I've had a few people ask for queefs and am happy to oblige. I haven't had anyone I don't know recognize me and say something to me though.
Doc: Besides the Stern show how else have you used your talent? What was the most fun you have had with your queefing abilities? (letting one rip in a library, while getting a wax, or in an elevator, etc)
Abby: I do it in elevators all the time to embarrass whoever I'm with. I let them rip whenever I feel like it, mostly when I'm bored or drunk. I went to a strip club once and told a group of guys I could queef and they each payed me $20 to hear me queef. They took turns putting their heads down below so they could hear it. |
| Doc: Speaking of sex, I imagine that your control of your vagina can make for some awesome sex, yes? |
| Abby: Yeah, I like to squeeze, hold it in me, and spit it out when I'm done. I do have awesome pussy control. |
| Doc: Where do you go from here now that you are Queen of the queefers? appearances? website? etc. |
| Abby: Hmmmm, good question. Where do I go? I chat on SFN quite a bit. I will hopefully be back on the show here and there. I'm not looking to make a career out of my queefing I just want to have fun with it. |
| Doc: Do you have your award displayed at your house and where if you do? |
| Abby: Abby: Hell yeah, on my dresser. |
| Doc: Your rapid fire queefing is amazing. What others things have you done with your abilities to push the envelope if you will? (blowing out candles, ping pong ball tossing) Have you ever tried to make tunes like Mr methane for example does with his farting. |
| Abby: I can play the harmonica, blow out candles, make songs, squirt water, the list goes on and on. I'll have to try the ping pong ball idea. Sounds like fun! |
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| Doc: Will the farter appeared in a porno recently. Jen, Miss Amputee, who is also from your area parlayed her Stern success into a Playboy shoot. Do you have any aspirations to do something like that. |
| Abby: I was asked to do a porn and turned it down. I'm not ready for that. I'd pose naked in a second, but we all know I'm self conscious of my titties. |
| Doc: Do you plan on entering the hottest chick with the smallest tits contest? Would you ever consider getting implants? |
| Abby: I was gonna enter but decided not to. I don't want people getting the wrong idea and thinking I'm some kind of attention whore. I have a talent and want people to know it. I'd definitely get implants though. |
| Doc: Is there anything you would like to say to Debbie and or Eve is this article. |
| Abby: I'm cool with Eve. |
| Doc: Anything you would like to say to Howard, to his fans, to your fans? |
| Abby: I love you! I love you! I love you! |
Thanks Abby and good luck in your queefing career and your future Stern appearances. If you would like to chat with Abby you can find her at SFN and at the Howard Shrine so stop on by. |
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