Cheaters never win and winners never cheat. Yeah the Pats got their video-taping ass handed to them but there were a lot of other things going on that amused me even more:

• During the pre-show, Fox football broadcaster Terry Bradshaw commented to Ryan Seacrest, "I thought the only time I would see you at the Super Bowl was as a cheerleader." That's some fucked up stuff. Seacrest laughed it off and I can see how he brushed it off so easily. If I were the host of the top rated and possibly the most popular TV show in the history of American television and made more money in two hours than Bradshaw made in his career, I wouldn't let it affect me either.
  
  
• Alicia Keys embarrassed herself. She looked like a fool as she LIP SYNCHED her entire medley of hits. Isn't she supposed to be a great vocalist? Why can't she sing live? Isn't that her job? Her gigantic booty belongs on a bench behind a piano with a live mic. And I love how she tries to speak 'street'. Seacrest interviewed her and Jordin Sparx as they stood next to each other. Sparx spoke very articulate and answered his questions candidly. Keys strained to sound tough and stood in stark contrast to the polished Sparx.
  
  
• Sparx also sang the National Anthem, also LIP SYNCHing her performance. What a disgrace to American Idol, the American people and our soldiers fighting for our freedoms across the globe. Is there anyone in the music world who can come out and sing that great song live? Mariah, Christina, Groban, Clarkson..? Somebody help!!
  
  
• Unfortunately, the only person who didn't lip-synch was Tom Petty during the half-time show. I'm convinced the NFL execs sat in a meeting to figure out who they could get who was the least relevant to music in 2008. Petty does have an incredible catalog of music but 'Freefalling' and 'Won't Back Down' put a halt to the incredibly intense athletic competition , his performance was sandwiched in between. It could have been worse though, at least we didn't have to listen to any of the lame rappers that are out there today. Why couldn't they get the Foo Fighters, the All American Rejects, Three Doors Down, Matchbox Twenty etc... I could keep on going!

• The commercials blew. I hate these morons who say they only watch the game for the commercials. What idiot wants to watch commercials? On Super Bowl Sunday, I flipped the channels as usual during the breaks. The commercials I did get to see were using the same old technique of shocking people into remembering the product they are pitching. How clever... Why in the fuck do I care if Duane Wade is in Charles Barkley's Fav Five. Who gives a shit. And who are these people who have people in their Five. Does this really (make your cell phone bill more affordable? HAHAHA.

• They showed a lot of 'celebs' in the audience. Eli's brother Peyton was in a luxury box in a sports jacket. Pam Anderson was there, not looking so good (I mean I would still hit it though). LL Cool J, who I'm convinced has gone under the knife sat in the stands and acted like any other fan would when he realized the camera was on him. That little chubby impersonation guy from Mad TV who Fox thinks is soooo funny sat in the crowd with some little hottie. He did a skit earlier in the pre-game coverage where he played Dr. Phil. It was so unfunny, it belonged on Saturday Night Live.
  
  My favorite shot of the crowd though, now that the Pats choked, is of Giselle Bündchen who was sitting there all smug, looking like she was sure a victory mount was inevitable. Only an overrated, pretentious, too thin, low chick on the Victoria Secrets totem pole, DiCaprio-ex would sit in a skybox at an NFL game sipping white wine. Why don't I hear talk about her jinxing Brady like we heard with Romo and my sweet Jessica?